Overdose thinking

Have you ever imagine what ur life would be if ur mom or other family members passed away? When I was at school, me and my beloved bff often talked about this matter...When our teacher got mc or meeting, we both love to share our feeling..She once said to me, "I cant imagine how my life would be if my mom passed away before me"....Me too said the same thing...then, we both keep hoping that we were to passed away before our moms.....

And guess what, it happened... She passed away before her mom..And it happened without any sign and goodbye..Who knows she was fated to die in an accident in such young age..In my heart, she remains as 19 years old girl.Now, three years has been passed by and its hard to find her replacement in my heart..Me and she had been friend since in elementary school until high school..And I believe that her dead was in bless.....


Its hard to put it in words how much we were treasured each other as bff....Friends come and go, but we remained the same as bff, never let go of each other....Up till now, she still my bff and everytime i look at her picture, i could flash back what we were experienced back then together...people always said that if want to know who is in girl's heart and soul, just open up their wallet, and the person is the one who in the picture in the wallet....I bet its true since i put our picture together in my wallet and bring it everywhere i go...... Thanks for giving me opportunity to be your bff even though you are not here anymore....All the memories will still be in my heart....Indeed, you were the SPECIAL one....Thanks 4 everything....

 

Expect for unexpected event

Have you ever been like "Aaah, im screwed...." "What I've done..?" "My life is ruined!!" " Only afford to being pasrah" right after get out of exam hall.....? Yeah, every semester right after get out of exam hall those are my dialogue session with my self. Almost in every subject.....Taking law stream sometimes makes my life mess, with all the cases, statutes, maxims, principles and all that related. My teacher at school after knowing that im taking law degree once said " ur life is gonna be tough, in the time as a student and in profession..." And im thinking that, "what sorcery is this..? you should be the one who cheer and support me, not to utter that kind of words which makes my brain cant stop from thinking this damn ques "can i do it? can I do it? can i do it? can i do it? can i do it?" (repeat until tired)- this is the most psycho moment. As for my fellow friends, the most cliche dialogue would be like "wah, future lawyer, if one day im in jail i'll contact you"..."u r taking law? it gonna be awesome"...Its gonna be fun they said....And my experience, just this -

why the jurist lied down too many principle? why so many cases? why so many blablablabla...

and many things in life i have to choose these:

 

Sometimes its hard for me to close my eyes in the night cz my brain will always reminds me this "many work to do and yet, you wanna sleep?" And.......yeap, i choose to sleep....hahaha....and in exam this will happen 

 

Take a deep look to the exam ques and just give a bundle of crap answer......yeah, thats my expertise...

Meanwhile waiting for the result come out, just expecting for unexpected result.....

 

Hard 2 find: part 2 (crazy things together)

 

           Have you ever been through an enormous crazy things with your friends? Yeah, we did it a lot, but im not referring doing something crazy naughty with your 'friend' but with your best friend.....
It is different kind of feeling when you r doing crazy things with a best friend...It feels like you own your own self and nobody can stop you, you feels powerful together, no scary feeling, wipes away your shy and just enjoy that very moment....

          It still crystal clear in my mind when me and my other two best friend in class doing funny things together. Three of us are the back benches in class. But its not portrayed our marks in exams....We were doing great in our exams and in the whole batch in school, we were in the top five... In my school, all of the students were compulsory to wear black shoes.... And yeah, we all love that as we are too lazy to wash school shoes every weekend and the dirt will not that obvious compared to white shoes.... As the time goes by, the black colour of the shoes started to get bleach. And what we do, me and my comrades use the black permanent  marker pen to re-colour the shoes and the result is....yesss, it looks like a brand new shoes, as black as charcoal..  tadaaa........

 

    (ok, thats not true, the colour turn into weird colour) its hybrid colour of black and purple....can you just imagine what colour it is? please use your imagination in maximum level....I just can't put it into words....At first, I feel so embarrass to wear the shoes but as time pass by, its immune to me..... hehe..Yeah, I feel unique in my own way, plus no teacher realized that my shoes colour was quite different at that time....

      I still remember when I stayed in hostel.... Me and my roommates was so eager to go to nite market a.k.a pasar malam but we were prohibited to go out of the hostel especially at night. And what we did, we 'fly' ('fly' means ran out from hostel for temporary) from hostel that night and climb up the school back gate.....Its crazy rite.... we also used to climb up the hostel's window in order to go out... It was my naughty experience ever....

        Besides that, we use to do 'shuffle' dance in class, toilet and infont of library....me also taught my fellow classmate on how to 'shuffle'...hahaaha....

what i think i look like...

how i really looked like....NOOB..

          

 There were many more crazy things i did with them but I wish to continue in my future entry..... :)

Hard 2 find....

me & her

I believe everybody has their own best friend ever so did i. She was my companion, my 'dustbin', my 'slave', my reminder, my competitor, my driver, my many more....Dont get confuse when I refer her as my dustbin, slave and competitor. These words cannot be translated literally as they wil turn me into bad person which treated her own bff like those things..


         Let me explain. She was my dustbin cz she was the one who always bear 2 hear my problems (which I regard the prob as trash)... Yeah, even the trivial things, she always offers her ears and shoulder 4 me 2 cry on. She was my 'slave' cz she loves 2 lend her hands 2 me whenever I need help (n thats what friends are 4)...last but not least, she was my competitor in class. We compete with each other 2 score in exams.. And that inspired me 2 be better than b4. I admit that whenever she got higher marks than me in any subject i felt something strange or what we call JEALOUSY. Yup, i got jealous with my own bff but its not to the extent where i regards her as my enemy. Instead, it manage to inspired and motivated me towards success. And thats why she was my reminder to me from being astray or out of track.
     
         But, as I said, she WAS my bff..Its not that we broke up from our friendship, but Allah loves her more.What im trying 2 say is, appreciate ur bff as their eyes still wide open, hard 2 find yet hard 2 forget.

Thanks for everything my companion......Knowing you was the great gift from Allah...<3

No discrimination......even cat being friend to sculpture of rock..
*not related to above story

p/s: to be continue.......LOOKING forward 4 INSPIRATION......